When Intervention Is Necessary

It can be hard to know what to do if you know someone struggling with addiction. Sometimes you might suspect someone of having an issue but aren’t sure. Both warrant having a conversation, and if you know the signs, you can feel more confident bringing up your concerns. 

When someone is struggling with substance use, there may be many signs that their habit has gotten out of control and requires intervention.

Your friend or loved one might start to miss important events or slowly back out of their commitments. This could be due to shame or distractions resulting from addiction. Physical issues can also arise, including weight gain/loss or lack of energy.

A person with a substance disorder may frequently apologize for behavior like drinking too much but can’t seem to do much to change behavior. Often, addictions result because of self-medication from anxiety or depression. Addicts are lonely people. If you have seen symptoms of these disorders in the past, it might be time to intervene.

Drastic changes in behavior are common, and people might become aloof and hard to keep track of. Isolation can be expected. You may feel you are being lied to in a strange context, or excuses are created to get out of a situation not typically avoided. They may seem less responsible than before and forget to do every day, essential things in their lives.

There may be no signs at all, especially in teenagers. The symptoms of addiction and puberty can be confused easily. Mood swings, secrecy, avoidance, defensiveness, and reluctance to introduce friends are signs of addiction that can be easily brushed off as teenage rebellion. Check-in with your kids. Don’t ignore that instinct if you really think there could be a problem.

It is essential to not feel guilty in case you miss these signs. Addicts can become masters at hiding their issues and crafting excuses for their behavior. We naturally want to believe our friends and family members, so it seems wrong to mistrust them.

If you still feel uncertain whether a loved one has issues with substance abuse, read our article “The Signs of Addiction” to better understand the indicators of addiction.

How to have an intervention

It can be hard to know where to begin when confronting a loved one about their substance abuse. The person could be dismissive and ignore the efforts if not done meaningfully. Even if all the care in the world is taken, research is done, and all words are chosen carefully, the loved one could still react negatively.

Let’s say a friend at church has been going through a hard time with work and is feeling run down and depressed. You would reach out to offer support and prayers, right? Maybe even connect them to resources that could help them navigate a hard time?

The same thing goes for addiction, but it comes with more guilt and shame for the friend, making it hard to reach for help. Often, getting a loved one the support they need will take a tough conversation that they won’t start themselves.

There are many ways to speak with a loved one about their substance abuse. People are unique, and you must decide what is best. There is no correct answer. 

Types of Interventions 

1.    Simple Intervention – Intervention does not need to start with an intimidating group. It can be best to approach the individual one-on-one and bring up your concerns. Allow the individual to speak freely. It is essential not to make the conversation into a dichotomy but to allow them to explain themselves and their thoughts. It’s not about making the individual see how their behavior is wrong but letting them come to their own conclusions. If you begin with accusations, you can be guaranteed to have the conversation shut down quickly. Instead, ask open-ended questions like, “do you ever feel like drinking to make yourself feel better?” Making sure the question is open ended but not accusatory is the goal.

2.   Classical Intervention- This is what most people think of when they think about “intervention.” A group of close family members and friends share their concerns about the loved one. Planning sessions may be required to decide how to help their friend—treatment, when to talk to them, transportation, etc. Sometimes an addiction professional may be brought in to plan and support the intervention.

3.   Family Intervention- Special systems are in place when multiple people within a family suffer from substance abuse or are contributing negatively to one user. It is always encouraged to bring in a professional for interventions, but they are required in situations of multiple users or complex family dynamics.

4.   Crisis Intervention – results from a medical situation from substance abuse that could potentially be life-threatening or dangerous. Upon sizing up the problem, the responding loved one offers rehabilitation on the spot after treating them.

Intervention Strategies

1. First, do research. Find out the treatment options near you and judge which one might be best based on your loved one. Many factors should be considered, like money, time, and types of treatment available. If your friend is a Christian, choose a program that has a solid Christ-centered element. It is helpful to be surrounded by Christians also going through the same struggle.

2. If you can— only encounter when the person is not under the influence. This tough conversation needs to be done when both parties are sober. If not, you risk the loved one not remembering or reacting more negatively than they would normally.

3. Speak with concern, love, and gentleness. Let them know they are not under attack and allow Christ to speak through you. Let the conversation be led by what God wants for them, not what you want. Use logic-powered observations about your loved one’s behavior that can’t be easily refuted. It may be wise to write out what you need to say beforehand.

4. Bring in mentors from church, family members, friends, or others they trust. It’s crucial to choose people trusted by the one being confronted so that they don’t shut down. Allow each of them to support the loved one and offer help. It is not always the best idea to be alone during a conversation like this, as you are essentially building a case for treatment for this person. If a small group of people they trust all see a problem, they are more likely to understand their need for help.

5. Be ready for any response. These conversations generally go two ways.

a. They see that they have a problem and accept help. They may seek treatment and be thankful for their loved ones who helped them.

b. They become defensive and angry. The conversation was received as judgment and triggered a denial of their substance abuse.

In the event of response b, it is best to calm down the loved one. Avoid discussing it further, as arguing will not likely result in a positive outcome. Have an exit plan in case things get more heated and leave the conversation for another time.

6. Offer treatment immediately. Having already researched the best choice for your friend, allow them the option to leave during the conversation. Arrange for a ride beforehand and pack a bag if you assume they would be thankful for that. Assure them consistently that this is the right choice and discuss the negatives of refusing treatment. Do not try to scare or batter them, but make sure they know that treatment is the correct decision.

After arriving at the facility of choice, the team there will take over treatment and rehabilitation. Your support as a friend will become a meaningful asset to their healing. Stay in touch when you can and offer an ear to their journey. Gather letters of support from loved ones to let them know you are rooting for them. Privacy is essential, so limit these interactions to those you know your friend trusts.

Recovery centers like 8 Oaks combine clinical psychology with biblical teachings to allow healing spiritually and physically. By choosing recovery with 8 Oaks, you provide your loved one with the means to find healing. Everyone deserves God’s grace, and people with substance abuse disorder are no different. 8 Oaks promises to surround each new client with overwhelming love and help them find joy in Christ. Our therapies are centered on getting to the root of abuse and discussing the cause of these disorders. We equip every client with the tools they need to walk out of our doors, ready to face a world full of temptation.

If you suspect someone has a substance abuse problem, reaching out is always worth it. Do not let fear hold you back; instead, stay strong in the true strength of Jesus and allow His power to lead you. Talk to 8 Oaks to get your loved ones the resources they need. For more information on our treatment and facilities, visit our page at “Treatment Overview”.